Back to School Mom – A Decade Later: Trauma Surgery Fellowship with Teenagers

By: Dr. Evelyn Coile

The house is silent.  The house is silent for the first time in the last 16 years of training.  Both kids received the news this week that they landed their first summer jobs.  My husband and I finally sit staring at each other—no one to cook for or entertain.  My eldest son, now a licensed driver, is taking control of the drop-offs with me closely watching a Life360 app and praying for constant safety. 

Previously, drop-offs were mostly handled by my husband.  From community college night classes while working, to attending medical school, followed by a vigorous surgical residency, I was not available for drop-offs. It is quite ironic that as I look back now (as most parents do at this phase), I wish I had made it to more drop-offs. To wish them a “Happy Day Ahead!”  To ask them “How Was Your Day?” It just always seemed that drop-offs were where the caring mothers existed. They knew the teachers’ names, the next PTO date, and served food for the class party.  I never knew any of these. But, that wasn’t my calling. 

My calling was to become a trauma surgeon. I like the movement and, most importantly, I’m an “I got you” kinda gal.  On your worst day, I got you. While other surgeons are sleeping soundly, I like being the one awake waiting for the page, waiting to save the lives of those involved in something they would consider their worst day.  I would be there.  I would get them through it, because I’m an “I got you” kinda gal. 

I know about the worst days. Sixteen years ago, my now licensed son was then fresh out of his second neurosurgery. A Code Blue had been called this time. We had nearly lost him. A mother will never forget the sight of her newborn baby boy turning shades of gray. I was motivated to be a healer at that point. In our worst of days, I found motivation to become a back-to-school mom—quite literally, at the worst of times.  I took one class, Political Science, over the summer.  Sixteen years later, we are finally almost done with my training. 

Sixteen years. A lot happens in sixteen years. Most people completing surgical residency find that reflection on their journey is focused on learning surgery and completing the amazing accomplishment of becoming a surgeon.  However, my journey truly is about becoming a surgeon and the amazing childhood of both of my sons.  There is regret, there is longing for past times, and there is tremendous joy and pride. My last sixteen years are mostly about all of their accomplishments. I can say they truly learned by direct sight a reflection of perseverance and hard work, even when I didn’t make it to drop-offs.

Dr. Coile is an AAST Trauma / SCC Fellow at UT Southwestern / Parkland Trauma Center in Dallas, Texas.  She received her MD and General Surgery Residency at Mercer University School of Medicine / Memorial Health University Medical Center in Savannah, Georgia.  Dr. Coile has also been a Registered Sonographer since 2002.

Twitter Handle: @evelyncoile